Digimon World

AHHHHHHHHH WALLACE WALLACE WALLACE ♥
Okay, I just finished watching the third movie of Digimon.
Wallace is still as cute as ever.
But the movie is so sad.
Oh well, I'm going to start playing Digimon World after it is done downloading.
I had to download so many things to play it.
Not that I regret or anything.

Wallace ♥

I am going to create a banner/avatar/signature of him.
When I finish Math Homework.

I still remember this particular detergent advertisement:

BANG!
And the dirt is gone!

Everyone in my class (5B) was obsessed with it.

Math Olympiad.

I hate you, Math Olympiad.
You just HAVE to be on Tuesday.
Now I have to waste 1.5 hours on TRANSPORT.
Then its another 2.5 hours just sitting in that room, moving my right hand and thinking a lot.
If you were on Monday, I wouldn't need to rush off for Band after that.
That would save me about 1 hour.
&^#%$@&^!*^($%#!

It seems like Sherlene partially locked her blog.
I shall ask for the permission thing.
If not, I'll just hack into it.
If I have time.

Report Books.

I'm really amazed by my Primary School Report Book.
I never knew so much changed.
This is going to be a long post.

Primary One, Mid Years.
English: 97
Chinese: 98
Mathematics: 100
Total: 295/300
Percentage: 98.3%
Conduct: Good
Remarks: Evelyn puts in effort in her work.
...
The remarks are... short.
And my conduct was horrible.
But my Chinese was awesome.

Primary One, Final Years.
English: 98
Chinese: 99
Mathematics: 100
Total: 297/300
Percentage: 99%
Class Position: 1/40
Level Position: 4/438
Conduct: Good
Remarks: Evelyn is consistent in her studies. She carries out her duties faithfully as a monitor.
Weight for Height Indicator: Underweight
...
My Chinese. I can't believe it.
And my conduct.
And the remarks.
And my Weight for Height Indicator.
Oh gosh.

Primary Two, Mid Years.
English: 95
Chinese: 97
Mathematics: 100
Total: 292/300
Percentage: 97.3%
Conduct: Very Good
Remarks: Evelyn is a bright and diligent pupil who takes pride in her work. She has adjusted well in her class and has been a good team player.
...
Note that I had just transferred from Pei Chun to Henry Park, hence the "She has adjusted well in her class" comment.
My English seemed to be really... horrible last time.

Primary Two, Final Years.
English: 92
Chinese: 96
Mathematics: 100
Total: 288/300
Percentage: 96%
Conduct: Very Good
Remarks: Evelyn is an intelligent girl who is attentive and responsive during lessons. She possesses a positive attitude towards her work.
Weight for Height Indicator: Underweight
...
I can't believe my English standards were that atrocious.
And I have a feeling the remarks were all faked.
I still recall daydreaming in class, and being called on by teachers many times.

Primary Three, Mid Years.
English: 90
Chinese: 89
Mathematics: 97
Science: 88
Total: 364/400
Percentage: 91%
Conduct: Excellent
Remarks: Evelyn is an enthusiastic pupil who displays pride in her assignments.
...
My percentage. It dropped by 5% in just 6 months.
I recall this being the period where I got more accustomed to Henry Park life, where Chinese was almost everyone's worst subject.
Looks like my Science was worse.
At least my conduct is better.

Primary Three, Final Years.
English: 90
Chinese: 94
Mathematics: 97
Science: 82
Total: 363/400
Percentage: 90.8%
Conduct: Excellent
Remarks: Evelyn is an independent worker who comes up with fresh and innovative ideas and solutions.
Weight for Height Indicator: Underweight
Body Mass Index: 13.3
...
I can't bear to look at my Science.
Also, "fresh and innovative ideas and solutions" probably meant "talking lots of crap and giving crap ideas during discussions".
And why was I still Underweight? I thought I went on my crazy Weight Gaining Schedule at Primary Three.

Primary Four, Mid Years.
English: 81
Chinese: 76
Mathematics: 93
Science: 86
Total: 336/400
Percentage: 84%
Conduct: Good
Remarks: Evelyn can be rather playful at times but she is willing to help her peers. She takes initiative when it comes to work, though she can be inattentive sometimes. Evelyn is definitely capable of achieving better results.
...
I recall this being the first exams I took when I was only 20% awake.
Hence the appalling results.
This was the year I was slightly influenced into being some juvenile delinquent too.
Hence the conduct.
But one of my favourite teachers was this particular teacher who wrote all these, because she didn't give up on my Chinese.
I was actually one of the tops in class for Chinese at the beginning of the year, and then I became one of the last few.
In the level.
Yep, so she helped me a lot.
And she particularly liked me for some weird reason.
Which scared me a little.

Primary Four, Final Years.
English: 89
Chinese: 86
Mathematics: 95
Science: 90
Total: 360/400
Percentage: 90%
Conduct: Very Good
Comments: Evelyn is diligent and helpful. She will take initiative to ask questions, there is also an improvement in her work. She has done well in her work and should continue with the good work attitude. Keep it up!
Weight for Height Indicator: Acceptable
...
This was the year when I received the Best in Progress award.
I improved by 24 marks.
I'm still quite surprised about it.
Also, I managed to get out of the Underweight category!
I guess my crazy Weight Gaining Schedule started that year.
And I still remember that teacher saying that I did her proud.
I'm still happy about that.

Primary Five, Mid Years.
English: 88
Chinese: 76
Higher Chinese: 55
Mathematics: 89
Science: 78
Total: 331/400
Percentage: 82.8%
Conduct: Very Good
Remarks: Evelyn has been progressing academically. She should continue to develop good habits of mind in order to improve in her Science. She is a steadfast and conscientious worker.
...
So this was the year where I flunked all my subjects.
Need I explain any further?
And the comments were completely false.
So much for "progressing academically".
Oh, and Higher Chinese wasn't counted in my total.
That worked really well for me.

Primary Five, Final Years.
English: 90
Chinese: 79
Higher Chinese: 71
Mathematics: 93
Science: 74
Total: 336/400
Percentage: 84%
Conduct: Very Good
Remarks: Evelyn is quite a competitive pupil. She has achieved excellent results for her Mathematics and should continue to do well. She is a dependable pupil. Good!
Weight for Height Indicator: Underweight
...
"achieved excellent results". Yeah right.
And I became Underweight again, because I didn't stick to my Schedule.
*Sigh*

Primary Six, Mid Years.
English: 87
Chinese: 77
Higher Chinese: 72
Mathematics: 92
Science: 79
Total: 335/400
Percentage: 83.8%
Conduct: Excellent
Remarks: Well-mannered and pleasant. Has the potential to do better in the academics.
...
At least I improved slightly for some subjects.

Primary Six, Final Years.
English: 83
Chinese: 88
Higher Chinese: 82
Mathematics: 92
Science: 72
Total: 335/400
Percentage: 83.8%
Conduct: Excellent
Remarks: Quiet and pleasant and reliable. Can focus well in class and is able to do well in the academics.
Weight for Height Indicator: Acceptable
...
Well, I'm amazed by my Chinese.
I was Second in Level.
And I still don't know how I did that.


You're probably tired of seeing all of those boring things.
But its not the end yet.
Its time for NAPFA results.

Primary Four, NAPFA.
Height (cm): 141
Weight (kg): 29
Weight-for-Height Category (%): 80
Weight Indicator: A
Sit-Ups (reps): 29, 5 points
Standing Broad Jump (cm): 165, 5 points
Sit and Reach (cm): 27, 2 points
IPU/Pull (reps): 23, 5 points
4x10m Shuttle Run (sec): 11.8, 4 points
1.6/2.4km Run (min.sec): 13.06, 2 points
Total Points: 23
Award: S
...
My 1.6 Run was so amazing.
I had asthma on that day, and I had to use my inhaler-which-I-lost-two-days-after-1.6.
My Sit and Reach was still as horrible as it is now.
And was I really that short in the past?

Primary Five, NAPFA.
Height (cm): 144
Weight (kg): 28
Weight-for-Height Category (%): 70
Weight Indicator: U
Sit-Ups (reps): 34, 5 Points
Standing Broad Jump (cm): 172, 5 Points
Sit and Reach (cm): 35, 4 Points
IPU/Pull (reps): 37, 5 Points
4x10m Shuttle Run (sec): 11.2, 5 Points
1.6/2.4km Run (min.sec): 11.51, 3 Points
Total Points: 27
Award: G
...
My stamina was better in the past, I think.
At least I got a C.
My Sit-Ups and IPUs were... amazing. For my standards.
And I can't believe I lost weight.
I bet it was the training for my Sit and Reach.
Only reason why I managed a 35 cm.

Primary Six, NAPFA.
Height (cm): 148
Weight (kg): 34
Weight-for-height Category (%): 80
Weight Indicator: A
Sit-Ups (reps): 36, 5 Points
Standing Broad Jump (cm): 194, 5 Points
Sit and Reach (cm): 35, 3 Points
IPU/Pull (reps): 40, 5 Points
4x10m Shuttle Run (sec): 10.7, 5 Points
1.6/2.4km Run (min.sec): 11.22, 3 Points
Total Points: 26
Award: G
...
Well, I improved.
My Standing Broad Jump was amazing.
So was my IPUs.
Sadly, I don't think I can do all that now.
And wow. I gained 6 kg.
All that junk food was definitely worth it.


I think this post is long enough.
Offtopic: ___ ___, I miss you. Yet again. Sit and Reach reminded me of you.

I see you online, but I can never bring myself to talk to you.
I really hate this indecisive and cowardly part of me.

Lies [Part 1].

I don't believe there's such thing as a "white lie".
This is what Dictionary.com says:

white lie 
–noun
a minor, polite, or harmless lie; fib.

And this is the example that they provided:

An untruth told to spare feelings or from politeness, as in She asked if I liked her dress, and of course I told a white lie. This term uses white in the sense of "harmless." [First half of 1700s]

Seriously, is there even such thing as a harmless lie?
Let's use the example that they gave.

By not telling the woman that the author did not like her dress, it just leads her to think that the author likes these kind of things.
In the end, the woman will be misleaded, which could lead to many things, like money wasted, relationship between the author and her becoming worse etc.
So, in the long run, the lie would be harmful.
Thus, it is not harmless, which contradicts the meaning of a "white lie".

I'll continue with Part 2 later.

Sometimes I ask myself,
When will I be able to overcome Human Nature?
When can I face up to reality?
When can I stop hiding?

The best I can do now,
Is cover it up,
And make it seem as though
I am able to do these.
Because, if I don't,
Things will happen.
Unimaginable things.

Straying.

I just noticed that I've been straying from the main point of this blog.

When I first created it, it was just for me to "Please my sister and stop her from pestering me to create one."
I wrote about all sorts of nonsense and didn't care about who would read it.

Then, I realised how dangerous a blog actually is.

Anyone can actually read your blog freely even though they don't know who you are.
So, I became more careful about what I typed in this blog.

And eventually, I ceased to blog because I got bored and lazy.

Then, one I-don't-know-how-to-describe-it day, I decided that the main point of my blogging was to write down stuff I normally write down in diaries, like my feelings, problems etc..
However, there was still the threat of unwanted people reading this blog.

But I just went ahead, thinking that no one would actually come and read my blog.

And soon, I realised that it was just way too personal and open for me.

So, I switched from Diary to Journal.
Basically, I recorded what happened on that day, and many other things that I found necessary to record.

Soon, I found that instead of constantly switching blogs to write different things, I should just write in both, with one locked, and one not.

In case you haven't noticed, this is the unlocked one.

The only difference was that in the locked one, I wrote freely, describing everything very clearly and openly, because I'm the only one that can access it, while in the one that is not locked, I write in a vague and indirect way, partially because it would test the analytical and deduction skills of both the readers and I, in future.

And now, the contents of my blog are basically a mixture of everything.

Then, I decided to ward off unwanted visitors, by putting on a password.
You might now ask, "What is the difference between my locked blog and this then?
The difference is that, this blog can still be accessed by others, and it is really easy to get in, while as for my other blog, it is virtually impossible to get in. The only one who can access it is me.

Right, I should end off here.
Its amazing how I managed to change the "theme" of my blog so many times.

Share-A-Thought

I still have no idea what role I want.
Initially, I wanted the Devil role.
Then I thought over it again, and wanted the Bad Sister role.
Then I thought over it yet again, and now I'm not sure what role I want:
- Devil
- Bad Sister
- Good Sister
Good Sister seems like a good choice.
I probably won't say why.
Just know that I have my reasons,
Which seem very valid to me.
And I'm DEFINITELY NOT trying out for Mother.
Take note of that, Hanna.

Hopes.

Looks like I crushed a few again.
You might have thought that you covered it up well,
And that I wouldn't find out,
But you must remember,
I'm psychic.
Its a piece of cake for my telepathy.
You're probably thinking that this isn't true.
Well, who knows?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To Whom It May Concern.

Although it probably is too late already,
I'm sorry,
And it was not intentional.
However, I have no plans on returning to the past.
What has happened, has happened.
There's no changing that fact.
If we were to forcefully do so,
It would just result in worse things.
Much worse, I can guarantee you that.
So, let things take place naturally.
If it is meant to be,
It will happen.
Vice versa.

If my suspicions were wrong,
I'm sorry too.
But I highly doubt it is.

Reciprocating. Betrayal.

My mother used to tell me,
Treat others the way you want to be treated.
Why is that so?
Because they will treat you the same way you treat them.
But now, I know that what she said was
Definitely incorrect.
It is only natural that people will take for granted of your niceness and willingness to compromise, as it is Human Nature to betray.
I was really a fool to have thought for one moment that this fact could possibly be false.
If being mean is what it takes for these to stop, then I'll gladly do it.
It is not as though I have no experience doing so.
Hopefully, you will learn to not take things for granted after this lesson.

The bell has rung, and its time for lessons to start.

Flash.

This is giving me a headache.
I can't decide on which topic to do on.
I can't think of any original idea.
Maybe I should just trash it and just pick out bits of every idea.

Future.

I have already decided on my future.
Preferably,
- An Inventor,
- A Computer Programmer, similar to Bill Gates,
- Majoring in Psychology,
- Majoring in The Study Of Criminal Minds,
AND
- Majoring in Music.
Why the weird choices, you may ask?
Well,
- An Inventor, because I can experiment and build.
- A Computer Programmer, because I'm interested in the Virtual World, and I want to challenge Bill Gates.
- Majoring in Psychology, because its fun to learn about Human Minds.
- Majoring in The Study Of Criminal Minds, because learning about Criminal Minds will be useful and interesting.
- Majoring in Music, because I'm interested.

One common thing about them is that, I won't get far if I'm not successful in them.
So here's my back-up plan.
I'll go into Business.
I'm sure I can handle that.

Liar Game.

I have finally found a new source of entertainment.
Liar Game - a Manga about a competition where imbeciles lie and deceive each other, for the sake of winning a game where you can earn big money.
Feel free to think what you want.
The drawing is kind of horrible, but the plot is nice.
There's so much to learn from this Manga.
I know you're probably thinking "Holy Shit, I never knew Evelyn liked these things!"
But there are many different ways to think about this fact.
And in case you didn't notice, this post is deeper than you think.
Give it a little thought.

Expectations.

Well, one thing I've learned about life today is that you must never set others' expectations of you too high.
Because if you do, you better meet their expectations.
Or suffer.
Like how I have to now.
Just that one thing can lead to so much trouble.
Even when it doesn't relate.
It can range to crazy results being expected from you to just the choice of food.
Yes, I know it sounds stupid, but its true.
At least, in my family.

You disgust me.
Watch that ego of yours.
Its killing you.
Stop putting on an act.
If you really want to, don't make it so obvious.
If you can't do it, then stop.
You're only making him hate you more.
You're getting his attention, all right.
Negative attention.

Stop giving me that eye.
Its not my fault that he's my close friend that tells me things.
So stop being jealous.
Stop talking behind my back.
Or at least, do it in a better way.
Stop trying to take on the role of the pitiful girl,
And making me the devil.

I know I'm evil,
They know I'm evil,
And we know you're evil.
If you really want to take on that role,
Change.

If you refuse to,
You can continue playing.
Just so you know,
I've never lost this game.

You don't know how evil I can be.
Hardly anyone does.
I'll give you the special privilege of experiencing it.
First hand, like the others.

Let's see if you can set the record.
Round one commences.

Insecurity.

I've decided to give my posts proper titles, instead of just dates.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This is to Liu Mei Kwun, Hannah. Mao Ning, I know you can see this, but just pretend like you can't. Please. And anyone else that happens to see too. Unless you're Hannah.
Sometimes, I wonder if the "you" you talk about actually means me.
Although the optimistic side of my brain tells me that it shouldn't be me, because I don't seem to fit in the description,
The pessimistic side of my brain convinces me in many sorts of ways that there actually is a high possibility that it is me.
It makes me wonder if there are actually hidden feelings in this relationship, that can't be voiced out.
Negative feelings.
Exactly how much do I mean to you?
I really am hoping that it isn't me.
The fact that you can hide things so well worries me.
I might still be able to read you,
But only a slight bit.
Although I know now that your current post isn't for me,
What about the others?
Such thoughts always pass through my mind,
And it makes me feel
Insecure.

21/5/10

And so, I'm starting on my Flash Assignment.
Since its due on 5th June.
This is going to take me about 14 hours to do, considering the fact that I DO NOT like my idea for it.

Okay, enough of the depressing stuff.
The good news:
1) I found the notes that Geraldine gave to me. It contains a lot of important information that I will definitely need, so thanks, Geraldine :)
2) I started on Science, and I'm on E4 now. Its surprisingly not that bad.
3) I finally made a complete draft for LSCEP. Its crappy, but I understand it, so its fine.
4) I found more games to play. A lot more. (Okay I'm not sure if this is good news, considering the fact that I'm going to start my End of Year Exam preparations now, but oh well.)
5) I finally started practicing my piano, and now I'm enjoying it a lot more.

So, time for bad news.
1) I'll probably still not be able to play the songs that I dislike.
2) I'm not sure if I understood my Science properly, since it was self-study.
3) My Math is horrible. I'm doing Math Olympiad questions at FASTEST, 2 MINUTES+, and SLOWEST, 10 MINUTES+. Its used to be FASTEST, < 1 MINUTE, and SLOWEST, 7 MINUTES+. I'm wondering how I'm going to do my paper for Math Olympiad.
4) LSCEP isn't going very well, I guess.

Yeah, that's about all.
Dinner time, I'll post more later.
Oh, I'm not removing my password.
NOT.
I might even change it.

20/5/10

Okay, for the sake of writing this and continuing on my depressed mood,

MISS LOO WHY ARE YOU LEAVING CRESCENT.

Who will make all of us so motivated to study?
Who will push us to fulfill our potentials?
Who will tell us those funny things that brighten our day, unintentionally?
Who will help make 2C3 the best class ever in History?

What will become of our Math marks now?
What will we do without one of our favourite teacher?
What will we do if we get a teacher that doesn't suit the way 2C3 needs to be taught?
What will we do without you?

Although what we say now won't make a difference,
All we want you to know is that
We'll miss you,
Badly.
We'll try our best to do you proud -
Score well,
Get A1s,
Behave very well,
Do our work properly -
And then we'll show you
The results of being taught by you.

2C3 ♥s you, Miss Loo.
Don't forget us like we won't forget you.

"...take the 10 marks and put it in your pocket!" - Miss Loo Ming Yang.

20/5/10

Hurt.
Sorrow.
Betrayal.
Disappointment.
Confusion.

I fell to the lowest levels of despair,
But no hand came to me,
Apart from the hand of Depression.
No rope came to me,
To pull me up.
No ladder came to me,
For me to climb up.
Nothing came at all
To rescue me
From the pits of despair.
Nothing.

I guess I should just remain there, dejected and devoid of social interaction.
Maybe that would be better for everyone.

20/5/10

For future reference, I shall post my marks here.
In order of lowest to highest,

Chinese - 44.5
English - 53
History - 55
Literature - 66
Science - 71
Mathematics - 80

Yes, I know it sucks, I don't need you to tell me.
All I can say is, I need to create a will soon.
Because if my parents don't kill me directly, they'll do it indirectly.
By making me kill myself.
Willingly.

On the bright side, I think I just gained $60.
I THINK.

I never knew a few alphabets could make such a big impact on life.

Good job, ___ ___. I think you did really well. Congratulations. Now can you please come online more often, and not only when Grace tells you to? ):

19/5/10

7 people.
7.
How did the number increase so rapidly?
I wish I concealed it better.

19/5/10

So many people are asking me for the password.
So I have them a clue.
A big one.
And after that, they could all guess it.
The clue: "Its a very common password."
Hoho I shall change the password at 9.30.
Or maybe 10.
Argh, when I finish my Typography.
So maybe its 12.

19/5/10

I warned you yesterday, didn't I?

I finally installed a Password for my blog.
Now things will be private.
Thanks Mao, for making me do this, in an indirect way (:
Actually its quite obvious, my password.
I'll remove this on Friday.
Well, maybe next Friday.

19/5/10

Tomorrow.
The day we get back our results.
First is Mother Tongue.
One tissue box will be used up.
Second is English.
Spirit will be dampened.
Third is recess.
Recovery time.
Fourth is Literature.
Heart sinks faster than Titanic.
Fifth is History.
News comes like how Little Boy came to Hiroshima.
Sixth is Maths.
News comes like how Fat Man came to Nagasaki.
Seventh is Science.
Temptation to use scissors to commit suicide grows stronger.
Eighth is Band.
Mr Chua is coming, so,
Suffers in all sorts of terrible ways.
Ninth is time to go home.
Murdered when telling results.

Okay, this aside, Art homework has finally caught up on me.
If I don't hand them in by tomorrow, I'm getting a 0 for those assignments.
And if that happens,
I WILL FAIL ART.
So I'm trying my best to complete it now.
Just finished 2 art pieces in 45 minutes.
The sketch, that is.
So next will be to sketch one more, and then paint them.
Hopefully I can finish before dinner.
I still need time to practice my piano.

18/5/10

And thus, I declare this blog to be unreadable.

18/5/10

Dearest ___ ___, this is for you. Like most of the others.

And so I look again.

At my contact list,
At Facebook,
At your blog,
At your pictures.

And I wonder.

Why did it become like this?
Why aren't you online?
Why aren't we as close?
Why do I still miss you?

And I can't answer.

No matter how hard I try,
To think,
To understand,
To put myself in your position,
To read you,
I can't answer.

And its the first time.

The first time I am unable to answer this question,
"What is that person thinking?"

-

It feels weird not knowing someone's thoughts -
Sometimes right,
Sometimes wrong -
As long as I have a rough idea.

But I can't understand yours.
At all.
You're so hard to read.

It seems as though there's a barrier between us,
Not letting me pass through,
Not letting me understand your thoughts.
However, others seem to pass through.

Only I can't.

What is it that I am not doing,
To make me unable to pass through it?

I hope I find the answer to this question,
So that I can find the answer to another question,
In order to clear my thoughts,
And let go...

If you see this, please don't talk about it.
I want it to remain unknown.
Thank you.

I miss you, ___ ___.
You said that it would pass on to someone else.
But I don't think it will be anytime soon.
I want to let go...

...But what if I can't?

18/5/10

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHARNE LEONG!

Okay, its time to test your eyesight, people. >:)

Science Inno was surprisingly fun today.
The potatoes were awesome.
Coming up with crazy ideas was really fun too.
Especially since its on cake ♥

Sex Ed was boring, as usual.
The talk on Homosexuality was the only one which I kept awake.
Not because I found it amazingly interesting, but because the aircon was so cold, I couldn't sleep.
But still, it was interesting.
At least I have more knowledge on how to bully people.
They talked about something like EC too, and I thought of ___ ___.

I stupidly did something wrong with my Aveyond file, and now I have to restart everything.
At least I upgraded from Build A to Build C.
Not sure if I really want to try Build C, though.
I'm still lazy to restart, so I'm back to watching anime.
Audition isn't as appealing too.
I'm hopping around things way too fast.
Next on my list would be to study.
And somehow, it seems very appealing.

Tomorrow will be more interesting, I guess.
Its Tchoukball (No, I didn't spell it wrongly) first, and then Science Inno.
While I'm having Tchoukball, I'll get to see ___ ___ doing Inter-House Games.
Knowing her, she probably won't do them.
But at least I'll see her.
I have to wear my sister's PE shirt tomorrow, since I don't have a second PE shirt.
I should buy one soon.
Her shirt is way too big for me.

Oh well, I should start on Flash soon.
And my book reports too.

Okay, its not that small.
Sadly.

17/5/10

What can I say.
Today was tiring.
Lips and fingers are numb.
Even typing has problems.
Really tiring today.
Kind of lazy to type it out.
Lazy to even stop typing in point form.
Will continue later.
I miss you, ___ ___.

16/5/10

Tomorrow.
The day where a lot will happen,
Both good and bad.
I can't wait for it,
Yet I can wait for it.
It will be awesome,
Yet it will be horrible.
It will be exciting,
Yet it will be mundane.
But we have to wait till then
To see what it will be.
I hope it won't be too bad.
Tomorrow will be the day where I will meet ___ ___ in a long time,
And it is also time for Assessment.
Somehow I can't wait to know if I can get in or not.

15/4/10

I really miss you.
Do you know how much it hurts?
Somehow I think you know
Yet I think you've forgotten.
Either that or
You're ignoring it,
Yet you can't ignore it.
Sometimes I wish I never told you,
But if I didn't,
It would feel a lot worse now.
When you talked to me on MSN today,
I was so happy,
Even if it wasn't a real conversation.
I'm really looking forward
To the next time we meet.
This is for you, ___ ___.

14/5/10

C.W.D is coming back. In case you're wondering what that is, its Chocolate Withdrawal Disease.
The weird thing is that my fridge is full of chocolates.
But I'm not eating them.
Don't ask me why, I'm weird that way.
There has been something wrong with me ever since the Attack of Exams 3rd Generation.

14/5/10

Curse you, Internet Connection.
Why can't you speed up?
Its annoying when I have to wait 14 hours for Audition to download finish, while others can take just 5 hours or less.
Oh well, at least I have connection.
I don't want another repeat of last time.
If it happens again, I'll probably be playing Aveyond.
Imagine how many levels I'll gain.
But I'll probably die without the walkthrough.
Someone said that getting your period at 14 is very late. Is that true? D:

14/5/10

Hahaha today was fun :)
Started off with me going to ION Orchard at 10, when we were supposed to meet at 10.30.
Made a mistake in calculating the time I would spent travelling there.
So I walked around and found future presents for people.
But Sherlene Low would be late, because she miscalculated her travelling time too.
So I ended up waiting for 1 hour.
Reading my book outside the MRT looking like a suspicious person.
And on the way I saw many Crescentians. At least 20.

So anyway, when Sherlene came, we went to walk to Takashimaya.
So we walked from the MRT to Orchard Road, then walked straight until we saw Takashimaya at the other side.
Then, we jaywalked. Well, jayran. I went through the plants while Sherlene went through some less planty area.
Then, we met Grace at the fountain.
And seriously, she looked like Nancy Drew.
Then we went to Yoshiyona, where Grace and I shared a bowl because we weren't that hungry.
Sherlene ordered the same thing as Grace, one Beef Bowl.
It wasn't that bad, I guess.
Then Sherlene and I found out that we actually took a detour to Takashimaya.
Apparently there was a much shorter way.

So after that, we went to the food area and bought food. Obviously.
I bought some fish-shaped Japanese pancake with chocolate filling (it was as awesome as usual) and a cup of ice-cream, while Grace and Sherlene ordered a cup of ice-cream.
Then we walked back to ION Orchard.

We went to Prologue next, where Grace bought her beanbag (I forgot what's the name), and Sherlene and I went to buy stickers. The file wasn't there yet, though.
Then we headed on to Sherlene's house.

It was a really failed practice session.
We were supposed to practice our trumpets, which we haven't been touching in a long time, but ended up playing Audition and just joking around.
Well, we managed to play for maybe an hour.
At least we had fun.

Okay this has to be cut short, since I have to go for dinner, so basically after this, we went home.
The trip was from 11 - 5.30.
Amazing.

13/5/10

You won't believe how much I actually miss you.
It hurts so much, it feels like something is ripping me apart.
My song selections aren't helping to make it feel better.
Neither is the fact that you're online, but I don't dare to talk to you.

13/5/10

Somehow I don't feel any different from the past few days.
Somehow I feel like taking out my Math Assessment book and start doing.
Somehow I feel like reading up on Chemistry and Biography again.
Somehow I feel like learning more about China's History.
Somehow I feel like reading Macbeth and reciting my favourite quote.

Somehow I really feel like doing more Math.

There's something very wrong.
I'm stuck in my half-mug mode.

I feel...weird.

Been waiting for this day for far too long.

Its finally here.
The end of Mid Year Exams.
For most Sec 1s and 2s, at least.
Heh good luck for Chemistry tomorrow, Sec 3s. And good luck for Literature and History tomorrow, Sec 4s.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA AVEYOND TIME!

And I can't wait for tomorrow.

Officially Missing You

All I hear is raindrops
Falling on the rooftop.
Oh baby, tell me why'd you have to go.
'Cause this pain I feel, it won't go away,
And today, I'm officially missing you.

I thought that from this heartache, I could escape,
But I fronted long enough to know
There ain't no way,
And today, I'm officially missing you.

Ooooh, can't nobody do it like you,
Said every little thing you do.
Hey baby say, it stays on my mind,
And I, I'm officially...

All I do is lay around,
Two years full of tears,
From looking at your face on the wall.
Just a week ago you were my baby,
Now I don't even know you at all,
Don't know you at all

Well I wish that you would call me tonight
So that I could get through to you somehow.
I guess its safe to say, baby,
Its safe to say,
That I, I'm officially missing you.

Ooooh, can't nobody do it like you,
Said every little thing you do.
Hey baby say, it stays on my mind,
And I, I'm officially...

Well I thought that I could just get over you, baby,
But I see that's something I just can't do.
From the way you would hold me,
To the sweet things you told me.

I just can't find a way to let go of you.

Ooooh, can't nobody do it like you,
Said every little thing you do.
Hey, it stays on my mind,
And I, I'm officially missing you.

All I hear is raindrops,

And I, I'm, officially missing you.

Officially Missing You Cover

This is dedicated to you, ___ ___.
And go away, you smart people who highlight.

12/5/10

I feel sick. Again.
Must be History Cancer.
The bad History cells are attacking my brain.
Let's use Science and a little of Maths to explain this.
Well, the format, at least.

Let the victim be a male.
Firstly, they start from the eyes, where the History viruses attack the eyes and start to blur the victim's vision. It also makes his eyes itchy.
Then, when the victim closes his eyes and rubs them, the History cells then use diffusion to travel to the nerve cells which connect the eyes to the brain.
When it reaches the nerve cells, it starts diffusing through each cell at rapid speeds, moving from the previous cell, where the concentration is lower, to the next cell, where the concentration is higher.
When it finally reaches the brain, it starts to spread within the brain as the brain churns with its brain juice.
The History cells then stick to the brain juice easily as the brain juice contains a substance similar to haemoglobin, lameoglobin.
The left part of the brain shivers and forces the Historyated brain juice out of the brain through the nerves.
The nerve cells then travel around the body, and collects deHistoryated brain juice.
This is called Brain Systematic Circulation.
DeHistoryated brain juice from the body then travels through the nerves and into the right part of the brain.
This is called Brain Pulmonary Circulation.
After this, the whole body is affected with History Cancer.
It takes just a few seconds for this to happen.

Okay, this fails. I should edit it when my mind is clearer.

12/5/10

For the first time in my life, chocolate isn't making me feel better.
I already finished the whole box (maybe 20+ inside? I don't know, I didn't count), and I still feel...like this.
I really can't wait for ______ to come.
And I think these blanks are annoying people.
Happy guessing.
And happy mugging for me.
If that ever happens.
I think it will become happy Aveyond-ing soon.
Or happy sleeping.
Argh. Decisions, decisions.

12/5/10

...
As usual, Science notes cannot be completed.
I just realised this all started because I started playing Aveyond.
Its more of my fault now, since I was the one that stupidly went to find the crack.
And now I'm playing it like crazy.
Oh well, I guess I'll just memorize D6 like crazy, memorize D7 normally, read through D8 and E2, and read through notes for other chapters.
And then die when I see the paper.
Oh well.
On the bright side,
Math only requires me to do the quizzes.
Honestly, I might not have done all of them if Grace didn't tell me that we would be demerited.

Hahaha talking to Grace is so fun.
I'll post the conversation here later.
The funny bits, at least.
So you readers can be spared from looking at Math problems.

12/5/10

I can see it!
The BIG, FAT, RED line on my report card.
All thanks to today's paper.
As usual, I slept.
Halfway through each section.
I seriously hope tomorrow will be a better day.
I don't want my last day of exams to be messed up.
Or I'll end up crying at home again.
Time to mug Science.

11/5/10

There is so much I want to write here.
But yet I can't.
Hence the short post.
Just know that its all in my heart.
Or my other blog.
Its really disturbing knowing that there are people reading this.
But I can't bear to lock it up.
Actually, there's no need to, since there's already another blog for this purpose.
Sometimes I really envy ______ for certain reasons that can be found on her blog.
And yes, ______ and ____________ are different people.

11/5/10

Okay, I'm probably going to fail Chinese.
I'm not studying.
I mean, I memorised the openings and closings, but I haven't moved on to the format.
And I didn't study a lot for my Yan Yu yet.
This is really messed up.

11/5/10

Studying Chinese is so amazing. I officially broke my personal record today.
See this lovely, amazing wonder?


I ate 26 of it.
26.
My old record was 18.
And I was watching Digimon.
I guess Chinese is really amazing.

11/5/10

I'm really enjoying Aveyond now. In a way, its good, because I won't be bored on the computer for a while. But its really bad timing. Chinese is tomorrow, and I'm panicking, but not studying.

English Paper 2 was difficult, I guess. I sort of gave up trying to rethink my answers in the end, and slept. And I still can't believe I stupidly slept for the first half an hour.

History was bad. Really bad. It was fine at first, and I was doing things fast enough for me to have at last 15 minutes in the end for checking and sleeping.

And then I made the mistake of closing my eyes for a while when I was doing the Reliability question of Section B.
I was completely asleep for about 25 minutes.

When I woke up, I resisted screaming, and rushed through the paper. And Miss Namita's words kept playing in my mind: Write neatly. I wonder if they can't mark my paper because its too messy.
I won't be surprised though. I could hardly read what I was writing too.

10/5/10

Why do I have this feeling that studying for History would be futile, as I would probably forget everything by tomorrow?
Argh. Maybe I should mug Chinese now.
Decisions, decisions.
I should use a coin! :D

10/5/10

Wow. Literature and English Paper 1 is over.
It actually passed quite fast.
But tomorrow is Paper 2 and History.
I'm dying harder and harder each day.
But Thursday will be better than Wednesday, at least.
And Friday will be the day I resurrect.
Oh well, somehow Ms Shakina's new favourite line is:
"Hannah and Evelyn, please write properly."
I think that if she sees my Literature paper, she's going to sigh.
Oh well, 3 more major chapters to go for History.
I'm starting to wonder if I should skip a few points that aren't as important.

9/5/10

Thanks a bunch, Liu Mei Kwun Hannah.
You ruined my time plan by introducing Aveyond to me.
I've been playing it for almost 2 hours.
Those 2 hours could have let me finish 2 chapters of History.
I'm dead now.
*Bashes Hanna up*
*Creates time machine*
*Travels back in time to the time when I didn't play Aveyond yet*

*Falls back into reality*

Ohwell. Guess I'll work extra today.

9/5/10

Great. I stupidly went to take a really long break.
And what was I doing?
Quite obvious, isn't it.
Well, for the benefit of the slower ones, I recoded my blog.
I have no idea why too.
The previous one matched my current situation really well.
But I wanted Wallace to be somewhere.
And Devil and Angel.
Oh well. Back to History, I guess.
It'll be a miracle if I pass.

9/5/10

Yay. I have an iPod Nano now.
Its my sister's, but she lent it to me, since its useless to her.
She already has an iPhone.
Somehow I'm not as excited as I should be.

9/5/10

I just realised that I probably don't have time to study in depth for History.
Meaning, I have to just read through some chapters.
Which would mean that I won't write notes for some chapters.
Which makes it all very messy.
And I hate my notes being messy.
This sucks.

8/5/10

Wow. Sick yet again.
I think I know why I've been getting relapses of my fever.
I didn't finish my antibiotics the last time, which was not too long ago.
Its not that I forgot to! I just misplaced them, that's all.
It didn't like me to eat it.
But it was only one. Or maybe two.
Surely it wouldn't be that bad, right?
D:

8/5/10

I wonder when I'll let ____________ know.

8/5/10

Great. My computer had a major rollback, and now my iTunes are all reseted, and I have to re-add all 400+ songs and organise them all over.
Progress in studying is slow.
I'm only at D5.
I'm starting to wonder if I need to replan my time.

8/5/10

This is bad. I'm getting more distracted. By the weirdest things ever.
Neopets has regained its charm.
I just earned 50k Neopoints through hardcore gaming in the past 1.5 hour.
The other would be Omegle.
Its so fun to see the reactions of people when you say stupid things.
Pity I didn't save screenshots of them.
I'll remember to do that in future.

Wait. That's not the point.

I should really just dismantle my modem.
And reassemble it once exams are over.

8/5/10

It hurts when it seems as though you don't care anymore.
It hurts when it seems as though I don't exist to you.
It hurts when it seems as though you're ignoring me.
It hurts when it seems as though you dislike me.
It hurts when it seems as though I mean nothing to you.
It hurts when I see you paying so much attention to another.
Another, who is of the same "status" as me.

I wish you could understand that you're hurting me.
Whether unintentionally, or intentionally, I don't know.

Life isn't easy now. Mid Years are coming, and I can feel the pressure.
But you aren't helping me.

Its late, I'm tired, and I have to sleep.
But I don't know if my thoughts will be clear tonight.
I guess I'll end here.

Goodnight, ____________. I know you're asleep already. Almost everyone is.



"I dropped a tear in the ocean. The day I find it back is the day I'll stop thinking like this..."
I hope I find the tear soon.

7/5/10

I HATE YOU DAVID MARSHALL AND LIM YEW HOCK AND STAMFORD RAFFLES AND WILLIAM FARQUHARD AND JOHN CRAWFORD AND SULTAN HUSSEIN ETC FOR APPEARING IN THE HISTORY TEXTBOOK.

7/5/10

And today is officially the last weekday before MYEs.

6/5/10

Study session with Grace was fun today.
Very productive, and we talked on the way about really weird things.
Of course we had a break too, and that was going to the canteen to visit Hanna and Haseena. That was fun too.

So basically, what I managed to do during those 2 hours:
- Finish up to question 10 of Maths Homework. Normally I would be doing this at night, just before sleeping.
- Started on Science Notes. Normally I would do this during the weekend, or maybe even later.

I feel somewhat accomplished.
BUT I SPENT A LOT OF MONEY TODAY. GAH. HOW AM I GOING TO BUY MY STUFF NOW.

5/5/10

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG I DIDN'T SAVE MY ANSWERS FOR THE WHOLE 2008 SCIENCE PAPER, AND MY 2009 PAPER B. WTHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

4/5/10

I need to revert back to mugging mode.
Somehow I can't get myself to study on the computer.
But printing out all my notes will take up a lot of ink and paper.
SO HOW ON EARTH AM I GOING TO STUDY SCIENCE WHEN I KEEP GETTING DISTRACTED BY MINICLIP, ARMORGAMES, ADDICTINGGAMES ETC.
Urgh. I think I'm going to do badly for MYEs again.
And I was hoping for no Cs (well if I scored C5 for Chinese, I'd be happy already, but no, I need to get B4), but it looks like its going to be impossible.
I'm really hoping that I manage to pull off some miracle and be able to concentrate and study.

4/5/10

Whee. Planning for 14th May is done :D
Can't wait to see Sherlene's house.

4/5/10

There's something wrong with Facebook.
It takes about 5 WHOLE MINUTES to load one page. ONE PAGE.
Argh, I think I'm going to give up on it.
Its getting boring, anyway.
I guess I'll go back to creating blogskins.
Or maybe I should study.
:\

3/5/10

Okay, I'm officially distracted.
Can't study anymore, Science is killing me.
Why must I learn about what is going on in my body? As long as its functioning properly, its fine. Gah.
Facebook is getting more boring, which is good, I guess.
On the other hand, I'm starting to look at food on Google Images.
AND OMG THERE'S ACTUALLY SUCH THING AS A LAVADONUT!

Its different from my version, though. Its supposed to be oozing with some weird substance that looks like lava, but is amazingly yummy, and very healthy.
Hahahaha this all started from LSCEP, when Mr Roger Vu was teaching us about Adobe Fireworks.

Ahh, my lavadonut~

I think after this, I'll start looking at Bakerella again.

3/5/10

I don't feel like going to school tomorrow.
I'll probably just sleep through everything.
It won't affect much anyway, since tomorrow is Art, Home Economics and Literature.
Also, what if I pass my illness, whatever it is, to my classmates?
Ergh, so many people are falling sick these days.
I wonder if its because of the examinations that are coming up.

Anyway, I wonder how many people actually understand what ____________ is.
I mean, sure, they might know who/what I'm referring to, but do they actually know exactly what it means?
This is amusing.

The dust in the Study Room is killing me.
I should really make the place slightly neater.
But what if I see a spider somewhere? *shudders*
Okay, forget it.
I'm not taking any chances.

Ah, dinnertime.
On the side note, I finished downloading all the albums of F.T Island.
There's something majorly wrong.

3/5/10

Finally, I'm done with everything except for the 2009 Paper for Science.
Maybe I should ask some of the Sec 3s to help me, since they took the same paper.
Hopefully they can remember some.

I'm getting addicted to Apple Juice.
So now on my table, I have my tablet, homework, medicine, chocolate, sweets, Yakult, a bottle of herbal tea and apple juice.
Its hard to alternately eat them all.

I'm missing ____________ a lot more.
This is very distracting.

Oh well, having sneezing and coughing fits now.
Its so hard to type properly like this.

2/5/10

I feel like crying.
And I don't know why.
Maybe its because I miss ____________ too much?
Exam stress?
I really don't know.

Homework really isn't coming well.
I finished Chinese, but its crappily done.
Science 2008 Paper too.
I really can't think properly.

My movements are getting slower.
Even my typing speed is slower.
And I feel cold, when its supposed to be really hot.
I really detest being sick.

I need to study.
A lot more.
I'm always so distracted.
I really can't focus.

Things aren't going well now.
It all started when ____________ stopped coming online.
Or maybe it was before that.
Now I'm just in a mess.
I don't know what I'm feeling.
I can't understand anything.
I feel tired all the time.
Yet when I try to sleep, I can't.
I don't know when to sleep.
I don't know when I'm overtiring myself.
I don't know anything anymore.

All I know is
I'm a failure
For not being able
To accomplish what I
Was meant to do.

2/5/10

HELLO HASEENA :D I KNOW YOU'RE READING THIS. HANNA TOO. I THINK.

...I have a fever again. A slight one though. But I'm afraid that it'll get worse. Its already 38.1 now. I don't want to fall sick on Exam Week. My CA marks are so bad. I can't count on them :(
Homework isn't coming well. Science papers are not done yet. Neither is the Chinese paper. Same for the English Comprehension.
So what have I been doing for the past 2 days?
Talking to Miley-Hanana and Pervyna.
Ohmy, I need to stop, but its too fun to talk to them.
And now so many people know about ____________.
Muahahahahahaha you can't guess from ^
Now 6 people know about this.
That's a lot. Crap. I should make things a lot harder to guess.
Oh well, I feel like watching anime again.

1/5/10

Whee today was fun.
I love Saturday Nights.
We were talking about NAPFA today.
And then we started some arm wrestling tournament for some weird reason.
And Ashley is very very cute!~
If only she would stop ignoring me sometimes :(

Oh well, talking to Hanana about _______ and ___ ___. Very interesting.
Hahaha I never thought I'd talk about these to someone other than Sherlene.
Oh well~
Not like I dislike it.

Oh and I finally have a game in my dead phone! :D
Rayman Raving Rabbids~

1/5/10

Argh, stupid woman. That method of yours is just stupid. You obviously don't learn, do you? Try to observe and think more. You're really stupid to think that it would actually solve the problem. Now all you'll get is rebellious kids, bad moods and lots of complaints from teachers about our homework not being done. You think we'll spend our time in the afternoon doing our homework like your ideal little kids? Never. We'll spend all the time we have cherishing our connection, and then we'll just ignore our homework. And then our grades will drop. Thanks a lot. I hate you. You're a failure, and I have no use of failures.