24/3/10

I wish you weren't that busy.
I wish you were more active.
I wish you would give better replies.
I wish you could make some effort to keep up with the conversation.
I wish you could talk to me more.
I wish you liked me more.
I wish for your attention sometimes.
I wish we could talk all day long.
I wish you would understand how I feel and reciprocate.
I wish we could just be closer.

But I know we can't.

So I'll just stay here,
And cry silently within my heart.
I'll think of you,
And stay alone in my sanctuary.
I'll cry out loud,
All alone.
My heart will ache,
All over you.

I'll wonder about what you think of me.
I'll wonder if you hate me.
I'll wonder about how much you think of me.
I'll wonder if its none at all.
I'll wonder when this will end.
I'll wonder if it never will.
I'll wonder what will happen if you reciprocate.
I'll wonder if you don't.
I'll wonder if I can stop being like this.
I'll wonder if I can't.

I'll waste my time on this.
I'll waste my feelings.
I'll waste everything I did for you.
I'll waste my effort.
I'll waste my thoughts.
I'll waste my energy.

And I did all these for you.

So I'll hope for a better tomorrow,
And a better reply.
I'll hope for a better time with you,
And a better conversation.
I'll hope for you to reciprocate,
And to return my feelings.
I'll hope for you to understand my feelings,
And not hurt it.
I'll hope for you to treat me like a friend,
And not a stranger.
I'll hope to be able to talk to you in person normally,
And not only virtually.
I'll hope for us to be closer,
And not further.
I'll hope for us to feel natural around each other,
And not tense.

So all I want to say now is,
I like you.
I can't say love. Its wrong.