Wistfulness

Friday, April 30, 2010

30/4/10

Whee I got bored again.
So once again, the mini project started!
"Hai haow arrz yoo naow?"

Sherlene:
Sherlene ♥ I miss you says:
*i feel very lazy now
*don't feel like studying
*but
*i didn't study today at all
*so HAVE TO STUDY

Hannah ignored! :(

Mun Yun:
           ★MY the CHIPMUNK☆ -Stressed Superior Chipmunk      says:
*?
*why you talking o weirdly

Grace:
Impending sense of Doom...; chain. says:
*hai whyz yoo talkin likez tatz

Stella:
SMD says:
*hiiiii
*hahaha not good
*:(

Haseena:
HASEENA (is a super happy banana!) says:
*HAI WHY EUU TOKING TO MIIE HERE

Omg so funny.

30/4/10

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HANANA BANANA/HANNA/HANANANANANANANANANANANANANA/HANNAH! ♥
Hehehe okay, so Monday is a holiday :D
But that just means I get tuition. And more studying.
Why can't MYEs be over. Then Band would resume. Studying would be gone (temporarily). Fun would resume. Post Exam Activities would start.
Everything is so fun about Post Exam.
:( So why isn't it here yet?

People aren't online as much now. Its sad that they are able to mug so much while I can't. My attention span has been deteriorating. I need to find ways to improve it.

Just printed out a whole lot of scores. Mainly Spirited Away. But I already prioritised Caged Bird ♥ Can't wait to start playing it.

Oh well, back to redoing my Flash Assignment.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

29/4/10

Wondering why there haven't been any recent posts?
Well, here's the answer:
MY MODEM WAS DEAD.
Seriously, it was terrible. Pure torture. 2 days without my most time consuming, most entertaining thing of the day.
How did I survive? Well, I lived off Visual Boy Advance, which requires NO INTERNET CONNECTION.
So I played Pokemon Emerald, starting from scratch, and thankfully, with my hacks.
That kept me entertained throughout the afternoons. And then after that it would be mugging time. But it felt so dead without the constant orange blinking light from MSN.
At least I had my music.
Oh well, time to finish all the chocolates.
Mom's coming home tomorrow, and she's stocking up the fridge with more chocolate :D

Sunday, April 25, 2010

25/4/10

♥ I have a very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very nice picture!
Its sad that I'm not inside though ): But its still very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very nice! ♥

25/4/10

Hah. I just saw someone join this page called "Join If You Secretly Have SuperPowers..."
Well, all I can say is, those people that joined are fakers.
How do I know this?
Because real Superheroes won't reveal whether they do or not.
This is why I will not join that page.

25/4/10

Mid Years are coming in 14 days. I guess I should isolate myself from my computer.
But I can't.
Because that would mean not being able to keep in touch with some people.
Life is getting more interesting.
But its really at the wrong time.
I need to study.
But I can't study enough everyday.
Because of this distraction in front of me.

Friday, April 23, 2010

23/4/10

Bored yet again, so here comes another mini project.
This time, I say "The prisoners are escaping!"
Let's see the responses from Sherlene, Mun Yun, Grace, Tha Yang, Jolene, Stella and Izzati!

Sherlene:
Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
The prisoners are escaping!
Sherlene ♥ I miss you (L) says:
*huh
*?
*prisoners...?

Mun Yun:
          Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*The prisoners are escaping!
           ★MY the CHIPMUNK☆ -Superior Chipmunk ♥s her graduating Agents      says:
*huh???
*who
           Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*The prisoners!
           ★MY the CHIPMUNK☆ -Superior Chipmunk ♥s her graduating Agents      says:
*such as?
           Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*The ones we keep locked in the basement

Grace didn't reply! >:(

Tha Yang:
Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*The prisoners are escaping!
♥Sleeping Beauty says:
*prisoners??:D
           Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*Yes, the prisoners!
♥Sleeping Beauty says:
*and who are they???>.<
           Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*The ones that we keep locked in the basement?!
♥Sleeping Beauty says:
*basement????
           Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*Yes, the underground cells!
♥Sleeping Beauty says:
*>.< hahaha pls explain who and what and where you are talking about!! I am lost

Jolene:
Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*The prisoners are escaping!
x me says:
*why?
           Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*Someone pressed the main switch to open the doors!
x me says:
*That someone is an idiot.
*How did those prisoners actually manage to get to the switch
           Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*The guard fell and hit the button!
x me says:
*Find the guard and fire a round of lead into his heart. Useless fool. What was he trying to do? Deploy the emergency team, contact the army. Those prisoners are dangerous. Get them back at all cost.
           Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*Alright, I will do that!

Stella:
Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*The prisoners are escaping!
stella says:
*prisoners? O:
           Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*Yes, ther prisoners!
stella says:
*HUH i dont get it:
*:(

Izzati:
Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*The prisoners are escaping!
Zat Z-Rex says:
*what thing!!
           Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*The prisoners!
*They're escaping!
Zat Z-Rex says:
*o.0
*WHERE!
*WE MUST ROUND THEM UP THEN!!
           Alien - Agent Digimon. ♥ Goodbye, graduating Agents ♪♫     says:
*Yes, let's go!
Zat Z-Rex says:
*HAHAHAHHA OMG YOU DAMN RANDOM!


Hahaha great haul :)

23/4/10

YES CHINESE TEST IS OVER!
But I think I'm going to fail. Big time.
Oh well, no point worrying about it.
MYE is in 17 days, and thankfully, I started reverting to Mugging Mode.
Only seems to work at 6 though.
So now, I'm still slacking, but I'm not spending any time on anything.
Except talking to Sherlene.
Oh well, I'm falling in love with Spirited Away again.
Maybe I should go and watch it for the 7th time.
Or maybe I should start watching all the Studoi Ghilbi movies.
Anyways, I can't stop thinking about ___________.
Mehehehehe fill in the blank with whatever you want, just not something ridiculous like some random boy name or spiders.

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

20/4/10

Okay, I'm supposed to be studying Chinese, but after cramming 16 成语s in my head, I need a break.
I suddenly became obsessed with listening to Band music. Now I'm listening to Spirited Away~ I really want to play that song. Totoro's nice too, and Persis is too. Overture No. 1 sounds nice. Wish I played it =\
Anyway, I just saw the assessment criteria for NBC and SIBF. And I got a heart attack. Its almost confirmed that I'm not going to play in those 2 competitions. Here's what it said:
Criteria
• Projection
1. Too soft
2. Soft
3. OK
4. A bit loud but can be better
5. Good

• Articulation
1. Completely no difference between notes of different articulation
2. Attempts to try sometimes, but not clear
3. Kind of clear some of the time
4. Clear difference between articulation types some of the time
5. Good variation and clear difference between articulation types, most of the time

• Tuning
1. Below average
2. Average
3. Good

• Notes and Rhythm
1. Not clear about notes and rhythm, many mistakes
2. Kind of clear about notes and rhythm, few mistakes but overall still good
3. Clear about notes and rhythm, no mistakes, flow of piece very good

• Tone
1. Not up to standard
2. Average
3. Good

Now tell me, how do you think I can make it through -_-
And there's something else, which made me realise how scary the new Exco is.

The Aims for the Sec 1s. That was scary.

Aims for Sec 1s to achieve by Aug
 Play notes with no funny sounds (ie. Tone is up to standard)
 Tuning (Don’t be incredibly out of tune)
 Able to hold notes: at least 8 counts at 40-60 crotchet beats in one minute
 Able to transpose from concert pitch
 Know chromatic scale well
 Know how to play Concert Bb, Eb, Ab, F scales
 Clear about different articulation (eg. Tenuto, staccato)
 Able to play Ponyo - LIKE A GOOD BAND

I can't do 1, 2 and 6. So amazing.

So from this, I can officially conclude that I need a lot more practicing, since Mun Yun is going to assess us when Break is over.

Monday, April 19, 2010

19/4/10

Art is screwing my life.
Its pulling down my marks, taking up so much time, and what do you get? Nothing.
Its not my fault that my Art is horrible.
Some things require skill.
It can't be taught.
I need to revise other stuff too.
More important stuff.
Since Art is such a useless subject, and we don't need for our future, why have it as a lesson?
Some may say that the government made Art a subject to be taught as a relaxed lesson for us, but just look at everyone in CGS and you know that its so wrong.
Art is one of the most stressful subjects ever.
Homework that takes up time that could have been spent on doing 2 practice papers.
And its not even important for our future.
I can understand a little for Home Economics, since we need to know how to cook for survival, but ART? What, we draw a picture and it'll save us?
I seriously see no point in taking Art lessons.
If what I had to do now wasn't a Project, I wouldn't bother doing it.
Like all my past assignments.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

I hate you, mother.

I hate you. Go to hell.
I know I just had to write a composition about how I thought my parents didn't understand me, and then after a while something happened, and I learned that they do.
But that was all fake.
These fucking idiots don't even know a single thing about me, apart from basic knowledge.
Even my friends know more about me.
Even people that I don't really know that well know more about me.
I'm not talking about basic knowledge about a person, like their names, birthdays etc.
I'm talking about what lies further beneath my skin.

You know nothing about what I really like.
What I feel.
And you don't care.
You just assume that you know me.
Just because I'm your daughter. Supposedly.
Sometimes I wonder if I'm adopted.
Because it really seems as though you hardly know me.

You scold me for doing some things, but you don't understand why I did them.
You scold me for my mood, but you don't understand why I feel like that.
You scold me for my facial expressions and body language, but you don't understand that I can't control it sometimes.
You scold me for so many things, but you don't understand the reason.

You just assume things and think you're right.
You tell me to control my emotions, when you're the one that always explodes.
You think I'm happy, angry, sad etc. when I'm actually not.
You mess up things and blame it on me.

Face it, you can't understand me.
Stop acting as though you do.

You don't understand that everyone is different.
You don't understand that I can't be like you.
You don't understand that I can't be your ideal child.
You don't understand that no matter how hard I try, I can't achieve what you want me to.
Because if I do, I have to abandon a lot.
A lot that I can't bear to abandon.
Its not just my computer.
Its my friends too.
Along with many other things.
So stop trying to force me to be what I can't.
Stop seeing things in one way.
Stop assuming you're always right.
Stop getting emotional before you find out the full story.
Stop making everyone affected because of your extreme moods.
Stop misunderstanding me.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Farewell, Dearest Sec 4s

Well, its been a while.
Hello dearest stalkers who read my blog. :)
Alright, let's get to business.

Today started off with me waking up 20 minutes late. And best thing was I didn't even hear my mom call me the first time. But I still reached school quite early. Compared to others, at least.

Then came Speech Day. It wasn't that bad, really. Except that I played a few wrong notes in American Graffiti :( And I think when we were supposed to "sit on the stage, smile and not fidget too much", we completely failed. I think we contributed to at least a quarter of the noise made in the hall. Hahaha and its like on my right, Sherlene, Jae Young and I are talking, and on my right, Shasha was so silent, while Jimin was talking to Mandy. Then Shasha was like completely silent or something. So amazing.

So after all the playing, we moved out. It was quite loud, in my view. So after we brought all of our stuff down, Sherlene and I went to help Percussion. So first, we went to the hall, and then Shermaine said that there was nothing left. So we went down again. And then we met Jolene in the Band Room, and she asked us to go help Percussion, so we told her what happened. Then after that we decided to double-check, and then we went to the Seminar Room instead, because we saw people coming down from there. But in the end, there was NO ONE from Band there. So after that, when we were coming down, we saw some people across carrying the Timpanis down from the Hall. So we decided to go there and help. And then it turned out that they didn't need anymore help. So basically we made 3 wasted trips.

After that we had a short break, when Sherlene and I spammed our cameras (Well, I used Grace's camera. And its horrible! D:<) with lots of photos. Then came the ceremony.

I have to admit, at first it wasn't that bad, but halfway through the passing down I felt some tears in my eyes, but they didn't fall yet. It was only when Hong Yi started giving her speech, did I start to cry. So when the lights were turned off, they all started streaming down. So it was just talking about a lot of very emotional and true things throughout, and lots of crying, until the Sec 3s were ready to show their video clip. After the video clip, which was awesome, the Sec 2s had to sing "I'll Remember You".

It started off okay. We were all fine. Tears were in our eyes, but they didn't come out. But when we came to the second "paragraph" of the song, people started crying, including me. And then our voices became really shaky and at some times, we couldn't sing. But we managed to pull through the whole thing, singing considerably well, in my view. By the end of the song, we were all sobbing, and tears kept streaming down uncontrollably. When we went to sit back down, we started wiping away our tears.

Next came Section Talk. That was one of the best moments ever. It started off with Shasha coming to hug us and asking us not to cry. And then she started crying. Okay, I feel guilty :( So after that, we sat down in a circle, and then there was this temporary moment of silence. We all had lots to say, but we couldn't say it. So Jolene started first, since she was at the (so called) start of the circle, and also since she seemed to be the most calm one. It was really hard to speak to all of them when you were crying. Your voice just keeps breaking, goes softer, pronunciation goes all wrong, tears keep streaming down, face gets scrunched up, and heart keeps aching. But nonetheless, we managed to convey our messages. So after a lot of sharing, a lot of crying, many touching moments, words from deep down in our hearts, we gave our presents to them. Then, we went out for lunch.

Lunch was a box of pizza and a bottle of Pepsi for each section, along with Chewy Junior. We sat on the floor outside the Band Room, and we started eating. We didn't really talk much. Then, Tha Yang went to get a whole box of chicken wings, and I seriously thought it was meant for the whole Band. But guess what? It wasn't. It was FOR OUR SECTION. They expected 8 OF US to finish about 30 CHICKEN WINGS. And then, Jimin went to get bee hoon. She started asking all of us to eat, and kept saying that it was her last wish for all of us. Hahaha luckily we had to clean the Band Room at that time.

So after packing up, we went to change up. Haha Tha Yang, Mun Yun, Sherlene and I raced to the toilet. I started running first because I thought there were only 2 toilets, and I didn't want to wait. So I asked Sherlene to run with me. Then Mun Yun saw us running, and then she started running. Then Tha Yang saw all of us running (Sherlene and I overtook her XD), and started running. Then she shouted something like "Not fair, I'm wearing court shoes!". And then, it turned out that there were 4 TOILETS. So we ran for nothing :(

After that, it was Section Dessert time :) We went to the opposite bus stop to wait for 111, and it took super long to come. One came by, but it was too full, so it couldn't stop. So after 3 132s and 2 32s came, and after meeting Ms Cheong and Mrs Lim, we decided to take a taxi instead. We split into 2 groups, and we waited. At that time, so many taxis came by, but they were all hired. Finally, one came, and Shasha, Jae Young, Tha Yang and Mun Yun went in. Jimin, Jolene, Sherlene and I had to wait for another one. I think we spent about 45 minutes AT LEAST at the bus stop, in total.

In the taxi, we were just talking and...yeah, talking. Jolene took the front seat, because the rest of us quickly went into the back seats first.

Then, we went to Yami Yoghurt, where I really regret adding on a topping to my yoghurt. Jimin went to pay for us, because she really wanted to get these stamps where you can get one if you spend at least $3 at Yami Yoghurt. I still ended up paying $2 in the end, but I guess its okay.

After that, we met up in Macs, and we ate there. We also talked quite a lot :D A lot of crap and bonding was spent there :D Soon, Shasha and Tha Yang left for their Mus Art Youth Band practice.

So after all this, it was time to go home, for the rest of us. But first, Jimin wanted to change out of her stockings, so we waited for her. Then we saw the YOG Mascots there. Okay seriously, the orange mascot's tail looked really fun to pull. So we were just standing there, while everyone else was waiting for me to pull the tail. But I couldn't at that time because so many people were watching. So when they decided to leave because Jimin was ready, I decided to take the risk and pull. And guess what? It was a success. And that guy was like falling back when I pulled. So fun~ Haha and when I told everyone else that I pulled the tail already, Jolene was like "Argh I should have took that! Evelyn go pull again!"

So in the end, we split. Jimin went on ahead first, and Jolene stayed in Plaza Sing to wait for her friend. Jae Young, Mun Yun, Sherlene and I then went to the MRT station. Then it split further. Jae Young and Mun Yun went on ahead first, while I accompanied Sherlene to buy her ticket. However, when she paid finish, the ticket didn't come out. And we started panicking, as usual. So we were running around the MRT station looking for the Customer Service Counter. When we finally found it, that guy helped us get the ticket, and then we started walking towards the MRT. And then we got lost. Sort of. We kept going the wrong way, thanks to Oh-Great-Sherlene who was leading the way. Soon, my mom called and asked me to go to Buona Vista, where she would pick me up. So that meant that I got to accompany Sherlene :D

So when we boarded the train, we went off at City Hall, and we took the wrong train, going towards Pasir Ris, when we were supposed to go the other direction. It was all because we saw the MRT doors open at the other side when we stepped out of the train we were in, and so we were like "Okay, let's go board that". So we went till Kallang before we realised that we took the wrong train. So we went out, and took the train back. It was a lot of time consumed, but it was well spent, considering that we talked a lot.

However, when I finally reached Buona Vista, I got lost. I was supposed to find the overhead bridge, but I didn't know where that was. So after about 20 minutes, I went to ask the Information Counter, and they gave me directions. So after that, I went home.

At home, I cried. A lot. But not as much as in Band. I've cried about 4 times at home already: In my room, When talking to Mun Yun on MSN, Bathing, and Talking to Sherlene and Alex on MSN. I cried another time just now, in Benjamin's house.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Now its time for pictures.












-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You might think I'm crazy, to have written all these, and to have cried so much, but my Sec 4s mean a lot to me.
They taught me everything I know, along with my Sec 3s, Izzati, Grace and Sherlene.
They guided me through the whole of last year.
They gave me a lot of support.
They didn't pick on me.
They treated me very nicely.
They taught me the importance of Music.
They taught me how to appreciate Music.
They were really good seniors.

So I'd like to tell you all,
That I'll never forget you.
May you do well in your life.
Come and visit us soon.
And here's this dedicated to you three.

You were our pillars,
Holding up the section at all times.
You were our roof,
Giving us a sense of protection.
You were our base,
Providing wonderful foundation.
You were our doors,
Opening new paths for us.
You were our everything,
That made the house complete.
The house that contained C.A.T.S.

You were our teachers,
Teaching us almost everything.
You were our friends,
Always being there for us.
You were our family,
Giving us constant encouragement.
You were, are, and will always be, our seniors.

May you remain in our hearts forever,
And may we remain in your hearts forever.
Its not goodbye yet.
But for now, I bid you farewell.
Thank you for the wonderful times we shared.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

14/4/10

I feel so upset.
I feel so depressed.

Why does it seem like you're avoiding me?
Why does it seem like you're ignoring me?
Why is it that we aren't that close anymore?
Why has it been like this ever since that day?
What did I do to make it like this?
Why did we suddenly get so far apart?
Why does it seem like this?
Am I being too sensitive?
Is it all just a mirage?
Or was it all just a mirage?
Was everything that you did just for the sake of doing it?
Or did you forget, and revert back to a long time ago?
Why did you change?
Or is it that I changed?

My mind is in a whirl now;
My heart is in a mess.
All I can think of
Is how much I miss you.

I see you online so much,
But I don't dare to click your name.
Even if I do,
I don't know what to say.
Even if I say something,
The conversation would die in a few minutes.
You wouldn't try to keep it alive,
You would try to end it.
Or maybe its just that
I'm too sensitive.

Whenever I see the window
With your name on it,
Not blinking in orange,
My heart sinks.
Why is it that it is always yours
Which is not orange?
Why is every other conversational window
Always blinking?

Why do you never reply me?
Why do you always ignore me?
Why do you avoid me?
Why do you only talk to me when its really necessary?
Why can't we go back to that time not too long ago?
Why is it like this?

Do you have any idea how much it hurts me
When we don't interact at all?
Do you have any idea how horrible it feels
When we don't talk everyday?

Do you know how happy I am
When I see the orange blinking light?
And how much my heart sinks
When we talk about Admin stuff?

What happened to the time
When we talked about random things?
What happened to the time
When we just talked about crap?
What happened to the time
When we just talked freely?
What happened to the time
When you made an effort
To keep the conversation alive?

Why is eye contact so awkward now?
Why is talking so awkward now?
Why is everything related to you so awkward now?
Why can't it be comfortable to be with you?
Why must it be like this?

Maybe this is because why its like this.
Maybe its because I changed.
Maybe its because I'm too sensitive.
But all I know is
I probably started it.
And I'm sorry.
So if you read this,
And understand that its about you,
Please forgive me,
If you know what its about.

And please don't forget that I love you.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

13/4/10

I miss the past.

The days when we were all happily together.
The days when we were not as stressed.
The days when everything felt alright.
The days when everything went right.

But it will never come back.
No one can reverse time.
No matter how much,
How desperately,
We need it to be.
However, despite knowing this fact,
It is human nature to regret and hope for the impossible.

So allow me to be what I am.
Human.

Allow me to hope for those times.
Allow me to wish that time could turn back.
Allow me to be naive.
Allow me to turn everything back.
Allow me to rewind everything like a video.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'll stop here.
I don't want it to be too long.
But its not completed.
Maybe I'll continue it another day.
Maybe I won't.
But I know that it will always remain completed in my mind.

This naive hope of mine.

Monday, April 12, 2010

I love you _____ ♥

Sunday, April 11, 2010

11/4/10

Ahh I haven't wrote about yesterday yet!
Haha so anyways, yesterday was fun but sad :I
So it started off with us all coming to Band, and then we were just talking in the Band Room at first. And then when Hong Yi came, she told us about the taxi driver that she met! Haha super funny, he keep talking about health products and etc.!
So anyway after that we were packing up the Hall! Hahaha and then it was raining so hard, and it was coming in the Hall! So when we were carrying stuff down/up/out of the Hall, we all got wet~
So after that (which took a lot of time), we did Reflections! Here's the questions:
Then after that Ms Loh came in and started talking. Then the Sec 4s had to share what they thought about the concert. So after that, Ms Azilah and Ms Goh talked for a while, and then they announced the results.
Hahah I'll update when I can remember all the posts.
So after that, we went out for lunch at Lido! And we talked a lot, about crazy stuff. Hahaha we talked about Barbie Dolls and Shasha's class using Robert Pattison and Miley Cyrus as their dart boards and about Sherlene afraid of RONALD MCDONALD.
So after that, we went to ION, and Shasha went for Mus Art Youth Band or something, I don't know what its called :(
So after that, Prim, Sherlene, Mun Yun and I went shopping for STUFF. First we were at B2, then we took an Escalator down to B3, then we went to hunt for the escalator down to B4 to go to Precious Thots, only to find that in the end, the photo frame that we wanted to get wasn't there! :(
So after that we went to Art Box, where everything was crazily expensive. So we couldn't get our stuff there :(
Then we went to Prologue. And we bought everything there! :D So happy.
And we saw this supercoolultraawesomewonderfulbelovedamazing file there. Argh I regret not buying it ):
So anyway after that, we went back home. Haha I had to cut it short, partly because I can't really remember that vividly, and partly because...THERE'S PICTURES! ;D




Debbie's reading!


Reflection Time~




The ONLY group photo. So sad.


Sec 4s standing to share.




Mun Yun became SL!


On the bus.


Lunch Time #1. Mun Yun is stretching and Shasha is scratching. Haha it rhymes!


Lunch Time #2. Sherlene didn't want to take! >:(


Sherlene's fear: Clowns.


The latest dart board. Very cheap, only $9.90!


Walking out of Lido. I can't rotate it! D:<


My lovely wanted file <3


Auntie Mun Yun carrying our stuff :)


Walking down in Prologue.

And that's all! :)

Saturday, April 10, 2010

10/4/10

OMG Yesterday (A few minutes ago) was so fun.
Well, let's recap...

My day didn't really go off very well.
I woke up late, and forgot to bring my camera. ARGH.
So after that, my day got very fun. Super fun.
Well, when I stepped in class, the board was filled with birthday wishes from everyone. I was so happy! Thanks everyone! 2C3 '10 <3
So after that we met in the Band Room, and we discussed our actions and checked our uniforms. Oh and we checked our files too. Hahaha only for like 15 minutes!
Oh and before that we were trying to cross this human traffic of Mass Run people 8D Super funny! Grace, Sherlene and I were the first few to make it past.
Hahaha anyway after that was Science, and then I was falling asleep there, because well, I slept at 1.30 am :P
So next was recess, nothing much to talk about, just normal talking with everyone :D
Then it was Lit! Ohmygosh I'm so dead for that, I just wrote all sorts of crap and then *poof* I had 5 paragraphs. Then I slept for 10 minutes, and I didn't wake up till Hanana Banana jabbed me.
Then it was Math, which was quite fun since all we did was draw graphs and talk 8D
Then our 1/2 an hour of Chinese! Hahaha I have to admit, it was fun, but I had to stand :( Punishment for not doing something I didn't know I had to do -.- But then we did the Cheng Yu worksheet, and then I managed to do it by myself for most of the questions! :D So happy.
And then after that, I received my Birthday Card from 2C3 '10! It's awesome, seriously! I'll post a picture later today :D Hahaha so happy!
And then after that was Lunch, where more people found out about my birthday. I wasted food today :( I didn't want to eat. Somehow. D:
Then next was setting up the hall! It made me so sweaty >:( But it wasn't really that bad :)
Then we moved on to rehearsing! Hahaha we only played parts of the songs, but it was still fun :D
So after that we had a break! Or rather, we performed our Ensemble to the whole Band and the teachers and Mr and Mrs Chua. Hahaha was fun and nice! Jimin, Tha Yang and Jae Young didn't sing loudly enough at that time, but its understandable. So scary man. Hahaha Jimin had a "nervous breakdown" after that!
So after that Fairfield came, and we went for a break.
Our break was basically getting the Crescentians to go and change into full Band Uniform. But because after that we had a rehearsal on our Ensemble again, we didn't change up yet.
So after the rehearsal, we mass changed in the storeroom. Hahaha I was in a horrible spot! Everyone could see me, but not like they would anyway. And Sherlene took so long! Haha but it was super fun, when we just joked around and asked everyone to hurry up. Some of them were so fast! Like Mun Yun and Grace.
Hahaha then after that we went to play the combined pieces with Fairfield. Wasn't too bad :D
Hahaha then after that I think we had dinner. Hahaha dinner was fun!
We went to get our presents, and we did gift exchange! Hahaha it was fun! I love all the presents I got :D
Hahaha and then I didn't start eating till I finished buying drinks for everyone. Hahaha I was like "Waitress Tay, at your service. May I take your order?" I can still remember what I bought, I think! 1 Green Tea Bottle, 1 Milo Packet, 2 Green Tea Can, 1 Chrysanthemum Tea Packet, 3 Mineral Water, 1 100 Plus Can. I didn't buy for Grace and Tatiana in the end! D: Grace's one was by mistake, and Tatiana's one is because vending machines weren't working.
Hahaha and halfway during dinner, the whole Band sang a birthday song for me! :D Well actually it was 2, the first one I ran away, the second one Mun Yun didn't let me leave. But I'm happy, really :) Haha this is like one of the happiest things :D
So after that we went to take photos 8D And then when they said take Section Photo with the Polaroid camera, I went to call the rest of the section, and then when they FINALLY came out, they took the photo already :( So sad.
Haha then after that we were just running around. Hahaha I went to pay for my 9 I-thought-were-lost-but-they-were-in-my-wallet tickets.
So after that was tuning and practicing actions, and then it was time for concert!
Hahaha concert was so fun!
When I entered, Bernard Gor and the rest all shouted "Go Evelyn!" So happy :)
And then there was one time when Hanana Banana and everyone else from 2C3 '10 that came shouted "Happy Birthday Evelyn!" Hahaha it was a bit embarrassing, but I'm glad they did it :D Hahaha and then the whole Band started laughing.
Hahaha okay I must talk about the songs.
March a Gentle Breeze was horrible, at the beginning. That part I played wrongly! My high G was played as high E in the end! >:( So angry at myself for not warming up properly. But by the end it was better, and I reached my High A! :D
Harry Potter was good :D I managed to play it considerably well this time, and hardly any mistakes were made in the Band!
Pinocchio was good, but my high notes weren't that good there :( And and I played wrongly, one part! D:<
Next was Phantom of the Opera. Ohmygosh that one...*sigh*. At the beginning it was okay, but then when it reached the transition from "Think of Me" to "All I Ask of You", I was quite tired already. And then "The Phantom of the Opera" was played badly. :(
Lastly, it was American Graffiti XV. I played fine, but Jolene's solo wasn't very good :( I'm sure she's feeling horrible now :( On the other hand, Tha Yang played wonderfully :D
Then it was intermission! That's when I met everyone :D First I went to family, and then I thanked them all :D Then when they went to get food, I met my friends. And they gave me chocolates! :D So happy!
After that when intermission was almost over, we went to get ready for our ENSEMBLE. Haha I say its a success, even though JJ said he couldn't hear the trumpets. But the singing was good! Sec 1s dancing wasn't very good though. Prim was going in the wrong direction I think.
After that, Fairfield was playing. Hahaha Grace, Sherlene and I were singing along to Der Vogelhandler. Then we went to get ready, and play Up!
Up was fine, but I think I didn't play as good as during rehearsal. Its not that I couldn't reach the notes, or get the rhythm correct, its just that it sounded...weird.
So next was Jupiter Pop. Haha that one was good :) No mistakes!
Then was our Encore, Ponyo! Haha Berneard Gor started shouting first :)
Ponyo was played really well, just a little too fast, I think. Mrs Chua didn't want it too fast, I think. But it was nice :D
So after that we went to pack up, briefly. And then Mun Yun was saying that JJ likes me just because the present he gave me was a pink heart shaped one. -.-
Hahaha then we went home. Bernard Gor and Sock Hoon Jie sent me home, where everyone was! :D
Then we watched TV together, ate together, and then we cut my cake! :D It was so fun!
And now Fiona's staying over :D Haha I shall bully her tonight! >:)
Hahaha then I went on to Facebook, and I think I have about 50 wall posts, all wishing me Happy Birthday! :D I'm so happy.


In conclusion,
THIS WAS THE BEST BIRTHDAY EVER.
Main reasons:
1) It was with one of the most memorable concerts EVER.
2) My section was awesome today.
3) My class was awesome today too.
4) My family was awesome today, as well.
5) Everything was just all going well, apart from the camera incident.

Alright, time to sleep :)

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

7/4/10

Hope is like a ray of light.
It can shine through anything.

Even the darkness in our hearts.

It is always there.
Guiding us.
Leading us.
Helping us.
It makes sure that we are never lost.
It gives us comfort.
It ensures safety.
It fills in a spot within us.

A spot in our heart.

On the account that it is extinguished,
We would lose our bearings.
We would feel lost.
We would feel insecure.
We would feel depressed.
We would feel like everything, means nothing.
We would feel empty.

Even though, at that time, we are consumed by the darkness in our hearts.

When that happens,
Our soul will no longer be there.

Our feelings,
All gone.
Our thoughts,
All clouded.
Our sight,
All misty.
Our hearing,
All distant.
Our feel,
All numb.
Our actions,
All uncertain.
Our tears,
All dry.
Our smile,
All dull.
Our scream,
All silent.
Our rage,
All cold.
Our heart,
All empty.

Ourselves,
All lost.

When we harbour no hope,
We are just an empty shell.
We would be emptied of everything we had.

It would start from our hope.
Gone.
Followed by our feelings.
Gone.
Followed by our heart.
Gone.
Followed by our senses.
Gone.
Followed by our ability to do anything.
Gone.
Followed by our basic human abilities.
Gone.
Followed by our possessions.
Gone.
Followed by our peers.
Gone.
Followed by our friends.
Gone.
Followed by our family.
Gone.
Followed by our sanity.
Gone.
Followed by our soul.
Gone.

What comes next,
Would be something so terrifying,
So tragic,
So disturbing,
So dark,
Yet important.

Death.

Most pretend not to revere it.
Most pretend not to care about it.
But when they are on the verge of facing it,
They realise its power.

Death can snatch everything away from you.

But in the case where hope does not exist anymore,
Death means nothing.
It is simply an end.
An end to a meaningless shell,
That has nothing.

Now, think about it.
Why do people keep on hoping?
If it is truly only the end result that matters,
Why bother with life?

Why bother to keep hoping?
Why bother to love?
Why bother to cry?
Why bother to rage?
Why bother to care?

This is because,
We have souls.

Souls are what allow us to feel what we feel now.
It might be good, it might be bad.
It might be happy, it might be sad.
It might be positive, it might be negative.

But no mater what,
It is these feelings that keep us filled.
Without these feelings, we would be empty.
Without these feelings, we would not be what we are.
Without these feelings, there is no point in life.

And where are these feelings?
In our hearts.
In our hearts, where everything matters.
In our hearts, where everything is important.

In our hearts, where not everything can be decrypted.

These feelings within our hearts cause the darkness.
The darkness which constantly threatens to consume us.
The darkness which constantly gives us problems.
The darkness which constantly gives our peers problems.
The darkness which constantly hurts us.
The darkness which constantly hurts our peers.

The darkness which can cause the unthinkable.

But there's one thing that can shine through this darkness.

Light.

For where there is darkness, there is light.
Unless we were to give up on the light.

This light, in this case, being hope.

The Light of Hope.

Never give up Hope.
Never give up on this lifeline.
For it will never give up on you.
It only leaves when you want it to.
And making it come back is not an easy feat.
So never give up this Hope.

希望の光
The Light of Hope.
Never give it up.

7/4/10

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GAURI JOSHI ;D
Hahaha tomorrow I have to say this to Teenee (Tiny Michelle).
Oh and I finished her card!
Its the first time I'm doing this :D
Haha I feel like some stalker, finding photos of her on Facebook, then cropping her out. But its for material for the card, so yeah.

Anyway, I can finally return to school tomorrow.
I can't wait, yet I can.
It'll be fun, yet it'll not be fun.
School is just like that, it has its ups and downs.
Well, actually, that applies to everything.

I have to bring my medicine tomorrow, to take after recess and lunch.
So wonderful.

And I have to polish my trumpet tomorrow! :D
Can't wait for it to be shiny and clean, unlike now.
But I wonder if I can finish.
Oh well, I'll do all I can.

I wonder how many people actually read my blog now.
I'd rather it be a dead blog, because well, blog = online diary.
You wouldn't want people reading your diaries, right?
But this is more like an archive for me now.
So in future, like 5 years later, I'll come back and read all my previous posts.
And comment on how stupid I was, remember good and bad times etc.

Oh well, I feel like typing something cryptic.
But not now, I have to settle Teenee's present.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

6/4/10

Headache.
I have a fever again. Looks like if this keeps up, I can't go to school tomorrow.
But sleeping seems to help, so after I go to Central today, I'll sleep.
Speaking of Central, I'm finally buying the presents.
And it seems like I might not give to anyone apart from my section.
I really don't know what to get.
But I might find something.
Might.
This is giving me another headache.
Argh.

Lunch time now, while everyone else is having Assembly.
I wonder how everything is going?
What is everyone doing?
I hate this feeling.
Normally, I'd wish I were at home, where I don't need to study in school.
But today, I feel like going to school.
I somehow miss everyone.
I seemed to have missed out on a lot.
I wonder if I'm correct?

But I better concentrate on recovering.
If not, I might not come on Friday.
And I'll have to say bye bye to my last concert with the Sec 4s.
Sigh.

I really don't want them to step down.
But there's nothing we can do, right?

Time will move on, and so will everyone.
It will never wait for anyone.
So if we don't move on too, we'll just be dragging everyone down.
So all we can do is move forward from where we have stopped.
Move on, and let our choices decide what happens next.
For it is our choices that create the path ahead of us.
For it is our choices that determine what kind of person we are.
For without our choices, we wouldn't be the special "you".

I look forward to returning to school.
And I'm sure that when that happens, I'll look forward to the weekend.
Its a cycle that never ends, but its Human Nature.
Or rather, Student Nature.

Alright, I have to finish my lunch now.
Then I can buy my presents.
They're going to cost a bomb, and I still don't know if they will like it.
Headache.

Sunday, April 4, 2010

4/4/10

Okay, I know I shouldn't be blogging now, but seriously, I can't concentrate on Chinese Gong Han.
I bet that the knowledge in our brains came in programs, and the doctor that was supposed to program my brain added in a defective Chinese program. So if you want to blame someone for my horrible Chinese, blame that doctor.
Well, since I can't reprogram my brain without losing its files (or in other words, my precious memories), I guess I'll just have to live with this defective Chinese of mine. So much for wanting to get into Higher Chinese. But I'll try.
Alright, its already 10.35, I need to sleep before midnight. Otherwise it'll be horrible tomorrow.
Speaking of tomorrow, I don't know whether I can actually come to school. I mean, I have coughing fits, sore throat, constant sneezing, and a slight fever now. Brilliant. I don't want to miss Band. Its my 2nd last practice before concert, and I still can't play properly. Here are the major mistakes:

March a Gentle Breeze: The part where 2nd Trumpet plays the melody? There's a high F and G, and I can't play it sometimes. Annoying.

Harry Potter: I keep getting the wrong tempo. Major Problem. And my lips get tired quite easily here, for some reason.

Pinocchio: High notes are all unreachable. And I keep pitching wrongly.

Phantom of the Opera: The worst. Everything is bad, especially high notes. I'm practically pitching everything wrongly, if not, I'm not playing at all.

American Graffiti XV: Fluttering. I still can't flutter for 4 counts. And I can't still can't slur and flutter. Some high notes here and there which I pitch wrongly. And the actions. Well we might not be doing them, but still.

Barae: Okay this one's a failure. I can't play it properly. I can't keep up with the tempo, I don't know where to jump to and how many times to play of some sections, I keep playing the wrong notes.

Up: Nothing much, I guess. Some wrong notes here and there, and I keep forgetting to enter at the right time.

Jupiter Pop: High notes and rhythm.

Overall: TOO SOFT.

This sums up everything. And guess what, by the time I'm halfway in Pinocchio, I'm very tired. Wonderful, can't imagine how Phantom will sound like.

Oh well, Chinese needs to be done.

Saturday, April 3, 2010

3/4/10

Oh! And Happy Birthday Shar-lot-teh (Charlotte).
May you have a happy 14th birthday :)

3/4/10

:) Feeling better now, after immersing myself with some cousin fun.
Now, they're watching some M18 movie with people cutting of others' scalps, bashing brains etc.
AND they're using too many vulgarities, especially the F-word. There's not a SINGLE minute where they don't use it, from what I've seen so far.
And guess what? Its supposed to be a C.O.M.E.D.Y.
Well, it failed, good job to the producers.

Oh well, getting some "love advice" from Mun Yun.
And I got some from Mao this afternoon.
Better not tell any of my siblings, family etc.
They'll laugh. And tease. And the list goes on.

I'm seriously considering putting a password on my blog, to block out...unnecessary readers.
But since my passwords are so predictable, its useless.
So oh well.

Stupid sore throat is preventing me from practicing my trumpet.
Speaking of Band, if I'm not wrong, 16 of my family members are coming to my concert :)
I'm so happy.

3/4/10

I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry.
But I can't accept it.
Really.
I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings.
Please forgive me.
And we'll talk about this another time.
I'm sorry.
:(

Friday, April 2, 2010

2/4/10

I'm scared.

I'm scared of losing my friends.
I'm scared of others misunderstanding me.

I'm scared that some things my friends say are meant for me.
I'm scared that I'm deceiving myself.
I'm scared that I'm deceiving others.
I'm scared that I'm not a good friend.
I'm scared that all these are true.

I'm scared of loneliness.
I'm scared of hatred.
I'm scared of love.
I'm scared of dejectedness.
I'm scared of eternal sleep.
I'm scared of watching eternal sleep.
I'm scared of sensing it.
I'm scared of helplessness.
I'm scared of betrayal.
I'm scared of being deceived.

I'm scared of the true depths of my heart.
I'm scared of my real self.
I'm scared of the past.
I'm scared of the present
I'm scared of the future.
I'm scared of the truth.

Yet, I'm scared of lies.
Yet, I'm scared of living in deception.
Yet, I'm scared of suspense.
Yet, I'm scared of not knowing the truth.

Yet, I want to know more.

I want to know more about myself.
I want to know more about others.
I want to know what is going on.
I want to know how to end my endless suffering.
I want to know how to end my friends' sufferings.
I want to know the real definition of white lies.
I want to know exactly how deep are the depths of my heart.
I want to know how deep my darkness is.
I want to know how deep my friends' darkness are.
I want to know how much light I possess.
I want to know how much light my friends' possess.
I want to know what others think of me.
I want to know what I think of others.

I want to know the truth.

But can I bring myself to know it?
The answer is, I can't.

Because I'm too cowardly.
Because I'm too ignorant.
Because I'm too foolish.
Because I'm too deceitful.
Because I'm too unclear.
Because I'm too confused.
Because I'm too unsure.

Because I'm too scared.

That is the reason for my suffering.
My constant indecision.
My constant headaches.
My constant heartaches.
My constant crying.
My constant worries.
My constant sadness.

My growing Darkness.
My shrinking Light.

All these, because I'm scared.